An East Texas photographer reached out to me to do a test photo shoot and I thought that this would be a great chance to conquer my fear, I had a hope that this would lead to me loving myself more. It wasn’t a boudoir shoot; I was taking casual photos by the library and I dressed up as if I were going to an interview. I thought my outfit was superb but you couldn’t tell from the photographs. There must have been over 200 photographs, and I’ve only seen 4. This is the only place I’ll voice this doubt: I wasn’t sure.
I didn’t know what to expect it was my first “shoot” ever (Easter Sunday). I chose two dresses and at first we were going to a smoke house, and then that changed last minute. So we turned the block and shot at the Rusk County Library. “Testing” where he “metered” me in and tried to find my good angles, but to my knowledge this also regards exposure. Scott was very easy to talk to, but again, I make friends with any one. I tried to do poses like I thought a model would, but he would ask that I look more natural. Whenever he got a great shot, he would start swearin’. Holy Shit! Fuck yes! He would let me see the pictures as we went along, and I would laugh at my awful ones. And then we’d resume taking photos in different spots, and he would tell me that the camera loved me and that I was pretty, blah blah blah. I kept wondering WHY women model. After 3 hours of shooting, I only received 4 photos, and told that it takes time to edit photos, at the same time I see this photographer asking any one to model with him, if they are local. As flattering as it was to be complimented and have some professional photos of me for free, I still felt weary that this was a GWC, and not a studio photographer. But we all start off some where right? And my creep meter didn’t go off. He seemed like a funny guy, some one who enjoyed classic country rock. We all start somewhere!
My eyeliner didn’t hold up too well in the sun! But I think the primer and make up worked well and take into consideration I haven’t splurged on make up in a year.
I waited until I ran out of everything – I didn’t have a morning routine any more. That’s all changing with the promise to take care of myself.
Below is a picture of all the goodies, I spent over $40, but did get $11 back in coupons. I also dyed my hair burgundy. What do you think? For foundation, I chose from Physician’s Formula a BB correcting powder, Maybelline’s Fit Me! in Porceline, an E.L.F. fluffy powder brush, Nyx Conealer. I chose a Physician’s Formula highligher which I love. For eyeliner, I chose E.L.F. gel pot in black. It came with a tiny applicator. (I need some new mascara!) For eyebrows, I got Nyx kit and I adore this. It’s the best brow kit I’ve ever invested in and I’ve tried lots of different eyebrow tools. I couldn’t help but snag that cute red lipstick, it stood out like something from a chemistry set. It was also my first matte lip color, in Red. I usually don’t do red, more coral and berry colors. But this was about stepping out of my comfort zone. This was about loving myself without limits.